September 10, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Mon, 09/13/2004 - 10:40am. Um...
"Maybe they're making sun-tea."
~My mom, on seeing a nearly full bottle of Mountain Dew on the sidewalk outside our hotel
September 8, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Thu, 09/09/2004 - 10:01am. Um...
"What do YOU know about open-mouthed lips?"
~My mom, to my brother, while watching Return of the King
My best friend's...
Submitted by scarletstarlet on Tue, 09/07/2004 - 4:28pm. Um...
"my best friend's brother, is, like, this gourmet chef, and he made us these gourmet cookies..."

(overlapping after "gourmet chef")

"my best friend's boyfriend is a drug dealer"


"uh...then your best friend should get a new boyfriend"
....This confuses me.
Submitted by takachan on Sun, 09/05/2004 - 6:50pm. Um...
"It's my boobs, isn't it? 'cause they're huge and yours aren't?"

-Two girls at a football game for Whitehall-Yearling highschool
Brain Surgery = Picasso???
Submitted by meera on Wed, 09/01/2004 - 8:19am. Um...
Woman: What is she getting her BA in again? medicine?
Man: Yeah... [pause] You know, I think it's like, what's that other thing called, again? humanities?
Woman: Oh yeah! That's it!
Man: Well they're pretty much the same anyway
Man and woman on the bus in Berkeley. Why doesn't *anyone* seem to know what a humanity subject is??
Polygamy and killing babies
Submitted by Alice on Tue, 08/31/2004 - 3:44pm. Um...
"Hey, can you marry two people at once?"

"Um, no, that's polygamy. It's illegal."

"Oh, well, that's stupid! You should be able to do whatever you want, like kill children."

-my friend who seems to have a very vague understanding of civil liberties... and me, confused over dinner one night.
August 27, 2004
Submitted by emberreign on Fri, 08/27/2004 - 10:47pm. Um...
", well, I really don't know what to do. You're telling me this and all I really keep hearing is that you love me, but you're in love with that hooker...No, you really think I would let you come home???? Gimmie a break, life is terrible for me b/c of you, and now it should be the same for you, only opposite."

---a woman on her cell, in a McDonalds in Avon, IN
August 25, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Thu, 08/26/2004 - 9:43am. Um...
"My mind is prettier when it's dumb than it is when it's stupid."
~My sister, in the middle of a conversation to me
August 20, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Mon, 08/23/2004 - 12:54pm. Um...
"People hit my nose more than any other part of my body. That's why my nose is crooked."
~A girl at Extreme Faith, completely out of the blue
August 20, 2004
Submitted by PurpleCow on Sun, 08/22/2004 - 7:13pm. Um...
"Whoa! I can lift the pool table up with my feet!"
~A girl at Extreme Faith, her sleeping bag unrolled underneath the pool table