A little knowledge...
Submitted by zytka on Tue, 10/04/2005 - 12:33am. Funny
"What knowledge do you think was sacrificed in favor of your alarming capacity for pop culture?"
"Who knows? I might have the brain cell that was destined to hold the cure for cancer, but instead I filled it with Madonna lyrics."
— a guy and a girl chatting at the corner of Durant and Shattuck (Berkeley CA)
I wonder if he said fifty or fifteen
Submitted by anxious on Thu, 09/29/2005 - 2:50pm. Funny
Preppy college guy: Do I really look fifty?
Jocular Friend: No, no way man! At most, you look a boyish 35.
Psychosomatic
Submitted by zytka on Thu, 09/22/2005 - 5:03pm. Funny
"You know what your lupus is, right?"
"Ahhhhhhhhnnnnnnnn autoimmune disorder..."
"It's self-loathing at a molecular level."
"Cellular level."
"Right. At a cellular level, your body hates itself and is trying to kill you off."
"You think they have therapy for that kind of thing?"
"Well, if they don't, they should. I think it could really help you learn to love yourself."
— my friend and I discussing my visit to the rheumatologist yesterday. (Emeryville, CA)
Names not changed to protect the innocent...
Submitted by zytka on Thu, 09/22/2005 - 11:36am. Funny
"He's quieter than Nolan, isn't he?"
"Yeah...he's more reserved – Nolan's a lot more interactive. If Nolan were a dog, he'd be a golden retriever. If Fayvor were a do–"
"Oh. I thought you'd say beagle for Nolan."
"Beagles are dumb; he's not a beagle."
"No, they aren't! And I was thinking of the energy levels – they're kinda hyper."
"But they're dumb."
"I thought they were smart. Our beagle is smart...she just has doggie ADD or something...but whatever. And Fayvor?"
"If Fayvor were a dog... Ummm... He'd be a cat."
— a lunch discussion at Asquew Grille about two brothers (Emeryville, CA)
This is called "pulling the look together"
Submitted by NeKo on Mon, 09/19/2005 - 10:03am. Funny
seen: punk-type guy wearing fuzzy pink bunny ears. and a t-shirt of a skull wearing bunny ears
I guess I'm glad I'm a size 10...
Submitted by paul on Thu, 09/15/2005 - 6:40am. Funny
"I'm sorry, but no one who wears size 17 shoes has any business wearing sandals!"

--a manufacturing associate at work, talking to a maintenance tech.
Intelligence levels waning...
Submitted by starryeyed09 on Tue, 09/13/2005 - 9:17pm. Funny
"I feel stupid right now or something."
- roommate
"Don't come back!" "Okay, thanks."
Submitted by sgamer82 on Tue, 09/13/2005 - 5:33pm. Funny
C: I told her don't come back.
E: That was very nice of you.
- A conversation I overheard between two of my work managers, "C" and "E", regarding another manager, "L", who was allowed to go home early instead of coming back after a doctor appointment.
Spanking
Submitted by Mia on Mon, 09/12/2005 - 6:49am. Funny
"So, I was gonna ask you if.... She's making faces at me again."
"What are you talking about? Why would I make faces at you?"
"Yeah, I think I might have to spank her. But she'd probably enjoy it."
--My friend talking on her cell phone with a brief interruption from myself. The last was accompanied by much laughter from the other two residents in the lobby. :) Julie is known for nothing if not her sarcasm.
And the towel would have nothing to do with it, I'm sure.
Submitted by lalaith on Fri, 09/09/2005 - 7:03pm. Funny
"My toes look so hot tonight. I could go out in just a towel and my toes and pick up men"
~one of my roommates