"She was like, 'Oh, I thought Buddy was lost!' and reaches under the bed."
"Teddy bear?"
"Pet snake."
--Two guys talking at Raleigh's.

"Tartare was kind of the sushi of France. Until the madness."
--A guy to a girl at Whole Foods

"Weren't you supposed to just sit on the curb and wait for me?"
"Yeah, only apparently New Orelans had some kind of curb law."
--A girl and a guy at Angel Street Thrift Shop

"No, the other day, I was in the elevator, and I look down, and there's a syringe. With a cap on it. Like, somebody just dropped a syringe! 'Too many syringes, just dropped one.'"
"Ew, God, how sketch. That's not even ghetto. That's pure sketch. Where the hell were you?"
"...In my apartment building."
"I'm sure it was a diabetic."
--Two men at Bar Rouge

"It's just that I've yet to really find someone who was willing to commit."
"Too much 'just hooking up, not enough quote unquote together?'"
"No, not commit to me, comitt to the drama. Really dive in, you know?"
--A girl and a guy at Jupiter

"He was like, 'Ugh, you smell like vodka,' and she just shrugs and says, 'What flavor?'"
"Stoli strawberry always smells like air freshener to me, too."
--Two guys at Bliss Bar

"Less the fact that he's still with Liz, more the fact that he says Liz wouldn't freak out over something 'little' like this."
--A woman talking on a cell phone at Andronico's.

"How do they even live with themselves? Sitting there all day, next to the corn cherry scones, knowing they're clearly inferior. Pity the plight of a mere strawberrry scone."
--A guy at Arizmendi bakery

"It must be so sad to be a lady with a flower stand. People buying flowers for their girlfriends all day, for their mothers, for their birthdays."
"That sounds really happy, actually."
"Yeah, but no one's ever going to buy flowers for her. They'll think, 'flower lady. Doesn't need more flowers.'"
"I'll bet she's sick of flowers. With a job like that you probably want... waffles."
--A girl and a guy walking down Durant st

"Adorable. Litigatable. Adoralitagatable."
--A woman talking on the phone at Whole Foods