"Baby, I want you to know how much I'm changing for you. Three months ago I would have considered beating that guy up to get his t-shirt, 'cause they're my favorite band and you can only get the shirts at the concerts. But now I don't, 'cause I know how you feel about fighting. So don't think I don't care."
--Overheard downtown, teenage guy to his girlfriend after a guy in a t-shirt walked by.

---

Now that's love.
Decide for yourselves whether it demonstrates love for his girl or love for the band.

"At first it was going to be a small ceremony, and we were just inviting family and best friends..."
"Right."
"But then she starts saying that she's concerned about our future, because I'm not romantic enough. That I never write poems for her, or sweep her off her feet. I say that I love her, and she loves me, and we're happy, right? She says fine, then she wants a fairy tale wedding to make up for the lack of romance in our marriage. We're not even married yet and she wants to rent a white horse to ride away on after our wedding, to compensate for the fact that we won't be living a romance novel!"
"Man, what are you going to do? Grow Fabio hair?"
"Well, no. Call me unromantic, but when I bought the ring, I saved the recipt..."
--Two twenty-something guys overheard in a cafe

"It's not the real world! It's a mansion in New Orleans! And it would be so much more interesting if they were living in a VW van in Compton. And then the name would be truthful, too."
--One guy to another, in a cafe

---

Interesting enough idea, but SEVEN people?
The line "Uncomfortable... like in the back seat of a Volkswagon?" keeps coming to mind. (Cool points to those who catch the reference)

"He's like some... Starbucks cowboy."
--One girl to another, in an apparently accurate description of a friend.

---

Is that like a high-tech redneck, or is this guy out on the range roping overpriced mochachinos?

"This store is so discriminatory! The girls' section is twice as big as the guys' section! And you get more selection too-- all they make for us is jeans and t shirts. You get tube tops. Pink tube tops!"
--Deadly serious dissatisfied customer at Old Navy to his female companion

---

First: Wow, this guy has almost as good an argument going as Mr Manthy does. (Sorry, inside joke.)

Second: Call me cruel, but do you really want to see any guy who has big enough breasts to hold up a tube top... in anything so tight as a tube top?!

"Ugh, he wants to see Gladiator tonight."
--40ish woman to her friend, while in line at the Macy*s counter.
"Actually, it's a pretty good movie."
--17ish girl at the register, interjecting.
"Would you like to go see it with my husband?"
--1st woman, without missing a beat.

---

I wonder what she would have done if the clerk had said yes?

"I really wish you would STOP saying that word that you keep saying."
--Man, to his female companion outside the movie theatre
"I wonder if he's talking about 'hella?'"
--A friend, musing as we passed by

"I am on the verge of insanity knocking on the door of truth. The door opens and I find I've been knocking from the inside."
--Written on a blackboard outside of my math final

---

Well, given the exam that followed, that was almost an inspirational message. Because it's always nice to know you're not the only one who's been driven insane.

"Hi, I want to buy the shirt in the window?"
"Ummm... Which one?"
*points*
*long pause*
"That's not a shirt... That's just... saran wrap we put around the dummy because we didn't have a shirt."

---

Which just goes to show that anything can pass as fashion.

"And then he's all, 'Marry Me'"
"Oh gawd what'd you say?"
"Sorry, desperation isn't something I'm looking for in a husband."