19 May 2006
Submitted by eve on Fri, 05/19/2006 - 10:56pm. Um...
"So, are you from San Francisco?"
"...No, but my fiance is."
"Oh, so you're just here for the Bay to Breakers?"
"I live here."
"Oh, that's great. We're having this party afterwards, you should come. All girls get a thong... in your size... we're taking pictures... you know, to promote our website."
--The world's skeeziest guy, and a girl in the restroom line at Tommy's Mexican restaurant.
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Alex
Posted by barby on Sun, 03/04/2007 - 5:26am.
Line spamming
Posted by Mike on Wed, 05/24/2006 - 10:28am.
If only it were a recent development. Unfortunately, this sort of thing has been around for ages. And skeeziest? Hah, you wish:

http://www.hydeparkrecords.net/files/htpug/picking_up.htm

That slashy thing again? Great. (*goes linkless and contractionless*)
 
Posted by Matt on Wed, 05/24/2006 - 10:41pm.
The most amazing thing to me is that they got girls to pose for the cover! Maybe they were misled as to exactly what the album would contain? There\\\'s always hope for that, I guess.

*time passes* I listened to about two minutes of the MP3 on the site, and... good lord. Are these the guys who fathered the founders of Gear (Maxim\\\'s little bitch)?

Oh, sure, I met my long-term girlfriend in a bar.

Through a mutual friend!

Wow.
 
...
Posted by Saint on Thu, 05/25/2006 - 1:47pm.
Look at all the bitches in dem dar hippity hop videos--there is no shortage of women willing to be humiliated and objectified for fifteen minutes of fame. Of course, men are willing too, they just usually go the Fear Factor route.

And...on no subject but that of rising anger, I saw on the news feed that Richard W. Thompson (convicted of sexually assaulting a child in Sidney, Nebraska) has been given 10 years probation instead of jail time...because he is too short for prison. That is correct, ladies and gentlemen, raping children is a-okay in Nebraska if you are under five foot two!

--I am powerless over my addiction to parenthesis.--
 
Blech
Posted by jcharles on Thu, 05/25/2006 - 1:28pm.
I like how his voice cracks while he\'s talking about how a guy should be cool and casual when picking up girls.

That was the only thing I liked about it.

So he lies to this woman about his job, and she\'s supposed to be impressed with his sincerity and trust him? That was about where I felt the anger rising and turned it off.

Oh, and I assumed the beautiful girls on the cover were just random pictures of beautiful girls and that there was no actual photo shoot just for the album. I\'m not sure if that makes them less skeezy than the line-spamming guy or not.

What is wrong with the tracker?
 
That 70s Skeeze
Posted by Mike on Fri, 05/26/2006 - 10:28am.
Yeah, I was really hoping that it was only through the magic of stock footage that these guys got those pictures.
That was about where I felt the anger rising and turned it off
Aww, then you missed my very favoritest of all the extremely sleazy pick-up scenes on the album: The Frank-at-the-department-store scene with the whole You have a great body-- just like my sister vibe! It is about 20 minutes in and is Just Plain Awesome. That sort of thing requires time and patience:

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/48473
 
Sick!
Posted by jcharles on Tue, 05/30/2006 - 7:32am.
You\'re sick.

Do any of these not involve lying? I mean, I guess you can tell from the title that these are not methods for forming a long-lasting, meaningful relationship, but still. I mean, \"backloading\" your prickliness is one thing, but he\'s spun this whole web about his sister\'s birthday coming up, and he doesn\'t even have a sister! Surely lying consistently about that for even one evening could get tricky.

Note: backloading his prickliness is not a euphemism for ANYTHING.

Oh, and speaking of sickos, whoever shot my cat in the face this weekend has some serious problems. Perhaps they could use a nice pellet embedded in their nose?

What\'s wrong with the tracker?
 
Poor Kitty!
Posted by pchick on Tue, 05/30/2006 - 4:13pm.
Someone shot your cat? Thats horrible!


~I reject your reality and substitute my own~
 
Damn right...
Posted by Matt on Tue, 05/30/2006 - 9:25pm.
If you go cat hunting,

a) make darn sure you kill it, and

b) be pretty dan sure the thing is feral. Last thing anyone needs is a Frankenstein-esque mob of torch-carrying cat owners knocking on your door, and you with nothing but a .22 or .38 to protect yourself.
 
Mmm... torches....
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 05/31/2006 - 6:50am.
It was actually a pellet gun, so the cat lived. He just spent a day with the pellet stuck in his face until I could take him in to the vet. Still, kinda disturbing. Who shoots a cat in the face? Even if they weren\'t aiming for his face, who shoots cats? I mean, besides Matt. I\'m not sure we can be friends anymore.

If I knew which neighbor it was, I\'d be rounding up the torch-carrying mob right now. A friend suggested I slap a helmet on the cat and send him out to seek revenge, which is an amusing thought; sadly, he is declawed. The cat, not my friend.

What is wrong with the tracker?
 
Who shoots cats?
Posted by Mike on Wed, 05/31/2006 - 11:10am.
http://www.hare.org/links/media.html

and

http://www.lovefraud.com/

Not that I am a psychologist or anything, of course, but specific life experiences have left me leery of certain behaviors and attitudes: pet and/or woman hunting definitely qualify. (The mp3 is awesome in a nakedly horrible way, not in a note-taking-and-emulation sense.)
 
Posted by Matt on Wed, 05/31/2006 - 8:35pm.
What MP3? I saw no link to any such thing.
 
The skeezy one
Posted by jcharles on Thu, 06/01/2006 - 7:48am.
I think Mike is referring back to the \"picking up chicks\" mp3 he inflicted on us earlier. Which, by the way, I knew you didn\'t actually admire except in a \"this is depravity in its purest form\" kind of a way.

What is wrong with the tracker?
Tommy's
Posted by hypoxic on Mon, 05/22/2006 - 5:38pm.
has an incredible wall of Tequila. Pretty much any tequila you want is available. The food is pretty bad but no one really goes there for food.
 
Posted by copperhead on Tue, 12/05/2006 - 4:12am.
how many kinds of takillya do people need?

i went to war for my country and all i got was this lousy stump.
 
Well...
Posted by steff on Tue, 12/05/2006 - 6:02am.
how many kinds are there?

...

what?
 
Posted by Matt on Sun, 12/10/2006 - 1:45pm.
I had a glass of mango tequila at the bar where my gf occasionally works. Rather tasty stuff, actually. No ice or mixer needed.
Let's break this down...
Posted by slugbuggy on Mon, 05/22/2006 - 5:09pm.
into its constituent parts:

"No, but" = "Look, don't take this personally, but I'm not really interested. I don't mean to be outright dismissive so I'm..."

"my fiance" = "trying to let you off the hook by alluding to the fact that I'm in a committed relationship, even though there's the possibility that it's just a polite fiction. Either way, I'm signaling you to back off, so let's just end this before I have to get the police"

"is." = "involved."
 
Now look at the gestalt
Posted by Mike on Fri, 06/02/2006 - 7:07am.
Skeezy guy overall summary: I am perfectly well aware that you find what I am saying disturbing and unwarranted, but I also know that it is well within the law, so I am going to take advantage of your unwillingness to cause a scene and make you squirm with my horrible squicky words and slimy demeanor. Funny thing about us jerks: we are glad to take advantage of the good nature of others no matter how miserable it makes them!

In an abstract sense sociology is actually pretty interesting: it leads to all sorts of surprising and sometimes counter-intuitive observations.

In person, though, it just makes you wanna punch people.

(*unduly annoyed by typing without contractions*)
 
...
Posted by slugbuggy on Fri, 06/02/2006 - 6:02pm.
Yeah, I just assumed the guy was unwittingly obtuse.

But thongs, in your size! How could anyone pass that up?
 
Intriguing thread options:
Posted by Mike on Sat, 06/03/2006 - 11:11am.
We could use your comment as a philosophical jumping-off point into the nature of good and evil and the oft-unseen consequences of our basic worldviews and varying perspectives of humanity...

...or we can segue into the subject of Japanese vending machines!

...

http://www.snopes.com/risque/kinky/panties.htm

</path of corruption>
 
Posted by Matt on Sat, 06/03/2006 - 12:11pm.
Ah yes. The old panty vending machines in Japan thing. Still weird, still proof that, in some parts of the world, \\\"Build it and they will come\\\" knows no limits.

It is only slightly less odd than the Internet hoax about Japanese women buying pants, skirts, and dresses that make it look as though their underwear is on the outside.

Less odd because, well, the vending machines actually exist.
Posted by Matt on Mon, 05/22/2006 - 6:24am.
First off, yeah. Skeezy, skeezy, skeezy. Anyone else smell amateur porn here?

And for those non-locals, Bay to Breakers is a 7-mile run across the width of San Francisco. Most of the people running it aren't so much racing as having a big party while all moving in the same direction. There are naked old people, lots of people in costumes and, until this year, lots and lots of alcoholic beverages. Apparently organizers set up checkpoints this year to confiscate things like beer kegs being pushed in shopping carts, as well as the famous Tiki Hut, a well-stocked rolling liquor bar. A great hew and cry was heard over the loss of The Tiki Hut.

That's the vast majority. There are also some high school cross-country runners and other actual athletes who are out there to improve on their best 10.5K time.


Oh, and a lot of people who live in San Francisco (and the Bay Area) aren't actually *from* here, they've *moved* here. Not surprisingly, Mr. Skeezy is a dumbass.
 
Confusion reduction
Posted by Jon on Mon, 05/22/2006 - 8:24am.
Thanks Matt. There's a beer commercial on the radio that talks about people doing interesting things during a 10K race (besides running), and the tiki bar is mentioned prominently.
Know I know that it's based on a real event. And knowing is half the battle. Go Joe!

- My mind is in the gutter, but it keeps out the bad weather.
 
Bay to Breakers
Posted by ParU on Mon, 05/29/2006 - 10:33am.
The one thing he didn\\\'t mention is that it\\\'s about 50,000 people in the race. It is amazing. It goes up a steep hill and it\\\'s always won by some Kenyans who fly in, win the race and leave.
It\\\'s Amino world without Chemists
 
Heh.
Posted by paul on Mon, 05/22/2006 - 12:33pm.
Go Joe indeed!
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