8 April 2004
Submitted by eve on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 12:01am. Um...
"And that's what I'm saying. What do you worry more about, social security or printer problems?"
--One guy talking to another, waiting for the elevator.
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Posted by marinerd on Mon, 05/10/2004 - 1:32pm.
I've been involved in an office move so haven't been keeping up. People (not me) collect a lot of crap after being in their offices for 20+ years. I've only been here 10+ years, and I'm not much of a packrat at work. The whole thing has been surprisingly stressful.

Plus, now I have to drive to work instead of walking. *sigh*
I worry about
Posted by Saint on Fri, 05/07/2004 - 10:41am.
Neither. I worry about old school video game sex. This surprisingly work-safe link brought to you by my utter boredom. Come on, guys, you have to post more--if you don't, I will, and no one wants that.
I think...
Posted by ParU on Sun, 05/09/2004 - 6:58pm.
they're all studying for finals, Saint.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by paul on Sun, 05/09/2004 - 10:29pm.
Better them than me, bro... *shudder*

paul is not our savior.
paul is known as 'silk' to all who know and love him.
paul is a past master at floating progressive.
paul is that man.
Oh, and...
Posted by brian65401 on Mon, 04/12/2004 - 4:46pm.
I'm also post-70, pre-79. OK 1971. Oh, and I found the best political t-shirt of the season so far at... This place
2-in­-1 comment
Posted by peegee on Mon, 04/12/2004 - 4:33pm.
1) Hey, I'm pre-1979 too (but post-1970), and I feel terribly old. And I remember, no, still own a matrix printer.

2) As for ParU's suggestion to ask the resident nerd for help (with KtG's printer): that might help, but please remember to treat such a nerd as a person not a commodity. I am a resident nerd at my dorm; when people started asking me to fix their other electrical appliances as well and repeatedly became angry with me when I was out of my wits or didn't have the time, I began to suspect that many sympathies for my person were purely pragmatic. Which is a baaad thing(IMSBADO).
Posted by Kris the Girl on Mon, 04/12/2004 - 9:46pm.
I don't know anyone who knows about computer stuff. I just know music majors. I wouldn't feel right using someone for their brains when I don't know them.
At least, in person. *grin*
Or sure you can do it...
Posted by ParU on Thu, 04/15/2004 - 8:08pm.
Kris - just ask your music major friends, they'll know somebody. But it does sound like your printer's dead - sorry 'bout that.
It's Amino world without Chemists
This Sysadmin's take on printers...
Posted by brian65401 on Sun, 04/11/2004 - 5:21am.
Inkjets must die. I had 18 of the little buggers in our building 1 1/2 years ago. And since all 18 were not bought at the same time we had about 12 different models taking 9 different cartridges.
I ordered 18 Lexmark E321s for all those desks and a Networked C750 color laser that I dropped in the General Manager assistant's office. Complaints lasted for about a week that they had to walk across the building for color, then they just stopped printing color. When they do need to print a presentation or something, the 2400dpi laser does a very nice job. Including the cost of printers and toner cartridges I hit the breakeven point in cost savings over the inkjets in 8 months.

At home I have a Lexmark E210 laser that cost $150 two years ago. It was hard to convince my wife that it would be that much better, but she acknowloges that I was right in this case. My local toner remanufacturer replaces a cartridge for $42 which usually lasts me about 9 months (4000 sheets). I have a cheap deskjet that I keep for printing color graphics; I never use it.

For the floor of the warehouse though, I swear by the Okidata 320 series Dot Matrix. They are pricey at more than $300, but ribbons cost almost nothing and the printer is built like a tank. I've never had one of these wear out. We have some that have been in use for 7 years without a hiccup. The only ones we've had to replace were dropped or had something dropped on them.

OH, and the house is under contract! Yeah!
Printers, emails, and misconceptions about age
Posted by Intelligirly on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 11:02am.
Number one, Cebu and I were both born in the earlier than that 70's. I'd venture a guess that, though there are a few who were born 79 and up, the majority of us were born earlier and are older and closer in age to the man who calls himself "Dad".

Two, dot matrix printers, while harder to find in the last few years, weren't obsolete when I went to college. Annoying, sure. Especially when somehow the paper would jump off the feed and get trapped and twisted like it thought life wasn't worth living any more and it may as well just jump to its pitiful twisted death. REALLY annoying when, like me, you leave writing your papers until at the earliest the night before and have five minutes to print everything out and run to class. Happened EVERY TIME.

And thirdly, I defend some printing of e-mails. I tend to write what amount to journal entries in some and want a hard copy record of the brilliance or angst or complete and utter silliness contained therein. Especially since I haven't had the same computer for very long in a row and have changed e-mail addresses periodically so otherwise I wouldn't be able to save them. It's a concrete memory, a simple way to time travel, if you will. Printing out a chain letter or excessive forward however? yeah, that's kinda dumb.

I love Mike!
Printer woes.
Posted by Kris the Girl on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 9:48am.
I have a mostly-new printer, just a year and a half old. It's an HP. It worked so well for so long.
And now it won't. And I don't know what's wrong with it. The little thingy with the ink cartriges on it doesn't roll across that metal bar.
Gah. All I needed was to print some emails. *grin* kidding! Really I need to print things like papers for school...wish I lived in a real town that had some kind of PC repair shop. I guess I could go chat up someone in the tech dept, though. I keep thinking maybe if it sits here long enough, the problem will take care of itself. heh.
Printer repair ...
Posted by ParU on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 11:39am.
Kris - some solutions to your problem.
1. Be really nice to that nerdy kid on campus and ask for his help. It's a time honored way of getting what you want.
2. See if you can clean whatever it is that's sticking and then get some WD-40 (the miracle in a can!) and spray where it's supposed to move. (It most likely won't work - sounds like you've got a fundamental problem).
3. What you'll probably have to do is buy a new printer - don't spend too much (~$100 is about right) on it, as they do tend to die now and then.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by Yuri on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 12:03pm.
"His" help, ParU?

Kris, what model printer do you have? And where are the cartridges stuck? If they're stuck in the center, try unplugging the printer and then plugging it back in again. Sounds simple, but it often works. I don't think WD-40's going to help; the cradle's not literally stuck, but rather for some reason it's not getting the signal to move.
Posted by ParU on Mon, 04/12/2004 - 7:42pm.
Hoist on my own petard! Nice correction Yuri - especially since my daughter's a pretty fine tech nerd herself.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Win-win situation
Posted by slugbuggy on Tue, 04/13/2004 - 8:12am.
I thought it was a part of the natural order of things, symbiosis-wise, that pretty girls (of the non-techie persuasion) usually appeal to nerd boys for technical assistance in times of gadget-related functional irregularity. It's a fairly standard deal - fixed stuff in exchange for a little estrogen-based proximity time.

My observations on nerd sociology are mostly derived from exposure to 80's nerd-genre flicks, as well as other respected sources on things tech-related and whatnot, so that's where all that comes from. Pretty incontrovertible sources, I'd say.

Getting a nerd-boy to fix social security for you though? Probably too late for that.
Posted by Kris the Girl on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 1:11pm.
It's an HP deskjet 3820.
The cartiges are stuck to the side, and they just...stay there. There's no "let's run back and forth across the printer when we're warming up! routine. When I turn it on, (and this is where I apologize for the following "technical" terms)the rubbery rollers on the bottom do their thing, spinning in both directions. The part where the cartiges go gliding across the bar just never happens, and then it blinks at me like there's a paper jam--but there is no paper jam. There is no paper in the machine, period.
I'm a bit leary to shoot some grease in there, mostly because...I have no idea where to even start with something like that. Plus I'm pretty sure it's something small, like "move that lever back" or "stop poking the badger with a spoon, nitwit" or it's just dirty and needs cleaned--HUGE possibilily, since I live in a dustbowl of a state--but again, where to begin? Feh.
Any other suggestions, oh wise partisans of IP?
3820 woes
Posted by umop apisdn on Tue, 04/13/2004 - 9:26am.
I just had this same machine die on me last week.
I suspect you will find that this machine is "disposable". :-( HP doesn't sell parts for it.

In particular, they are prone to breaking a little plastic cog that controls the movement of the print head carrier. When this cog breaks, the print head stops moving. I was utterly unable to find a replacement part for mine.

A precariously balanced mixture of myopic optimism and rampant paranoia.
Posted by Kris the Girl on Wed, 04/14/2004 - 6:40am.
Well, I guess I'll be asking the parent-fairies for some money, dangit. I hate that. The printer worked great, never had a problem with it, until it didn't. And what happened to your sounds like what mine has done. Gah.
Well...oh well. The PC lab is just a field away, I can print stuff there. But I do miss my color printer. *sob*
Paper jam!!
Posted by marinerd on Thu, 04/15/2004 - 10:31am.
I had an HP home printer that died on me once, and insisted there was a paper jam. After calling HP many names, and doing everything I could think of software- and hardware-wise, I discovered the problem. There was a pencil inside the thing.

Of course, I blamed one of the kids.

I remember the first computer printer I ever saw. It was a sort of primitive ink jet, and was the size of a walk-in closet. It made an amazing amount of noise. The idea that you could "send" a "print job" to it and it would print a document on paper without you having to type it was so astounding, all the secretaries would gather round to watch it. Of course, we weren't using PCs then, we were using "magnetic card selectric typewriters". A big step up from an "MTST" Ha!!

I guess that means I was born before 1979.
Posted by Yuri on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 4:54pm.
Oh, no no. Keep poking badgers with spoons. That's original, and you can confess later anyway.

See if this HP guide helps:

If it doesn't, there are links from there to contact tech support. Yeah, they'll probably frustrate the heck out of you, but if they can save you the cost of a new printer it's worth it.
Love Eddie!
Posted by matraiea on Tue, 04/13/2004 - 10:06pm.
Yay, someone else got the Eddie Izzard reference... ^_^
Thanks, Yuri
Posted by Kris the Girl on Mon, 04/12/2004 - 9:50pm.
I did their steps, and to no avail, so...I guess "get it serviced" is my option, or get a new one. It did make a fun snapping noise when I ran the deal with the clutch pushed down. heh. Although I may have broken it farther....I'm just beyond caring again, at this point.
Why can't these things just start working again all on their own? =p
Printing fool
Posted by Jon on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 8:40am.
I'm another born before '79. Not ages before, mark you, but a few years.

My favorite printer at work story (in the 'Office Space' style) was when a person was printing a seemingly endless document from across the building. I looked at the printer queue, my first line of defence, and noticed it was over 100 pages long. When I looked at the offending document, I saw that it was printing a spreadsheet like so:

page1: line of text
page2: blank
page3: line of text
(ad absurditum)

Yes, it was page-breaking for every blank line on the spreadsheet. When I pointed it out to the person printing it, she didn't give a ****, even though it was preventing anyone else from using the printer.

Another reason why I like my latest job better - people who actually fix problems if they caused them.
A male relative of mine was r
Posted by Dolmena on Fri, 06/25/2004 - 8:29am.
A male relative of mine was rushed to the hospital because his heart stopped when the office printer finally printed his document. He claimed he thought it was just shock because it was printing his document right. I'm not sure that he was kidding... but he has a pacemaker now.


I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
Printers vs. Social Security
Posted by Desert Fox on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 11:15am.
Printer problems, hands down (opposable thumbs and all). Social Security is merely a lost cause, but printers are the root of much that is evil in the world. In my experience, anyhow.

Social Security sounds to me like something that you'd hear in a 2AM Barstow infomercial for some anti-anxiety snakeoil. "Stop stressing! Improve your social security! Enjoy life more!"

The only thing Social Security seems to really be good for is a short burst of low-level amusement whenever I get those updates in the mail telling me that my next-of-kin will get a "one-time death benefit" of $255 should I walk in front of a bus tomorrow. Woo-hoo, that'll keep my pets fed for a month or so.


"Life is too short for grief. Or regret. Or bullshit." -- Edward Abbey, Vox Clamantis in Deserto
Posted by steff on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 10:47pm.
i second matt's comment. if by some miracle i get a s.s. check, i'm blowin' it all on booze and loose men. medical bills? thaaaaaaat's what your 401k is for, folks.
Damn it do we
Posted by hypoxic on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 9:11am.
all have to line up behind tim again? How come he keeps getting in there first?
Posted by Apple on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 10:07am.
He's stalking.

And as for jcharles, tired to the point of delusion seems to be the answer. Not the solution, but an explanation anyway.

Posted by steff on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 10:04am.
the phrase "lying in wait" comes to mind...
Posted by tim on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 4:51am.
I'll probably be way looser than you'd like by then huh??
--" The torture never stops"--
Posted by Apple on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 11:50pm.
I have none about S.S. I know for sure I'm not getting one. If I did, I'd just use the money on someone other than myself. 'Tis what I do with birthday money, why should government returns be any different?? *grin*

As for the printer, Epson sucks ass. I've (and by that I mean Mr Man) exchanged three because the ink cartridge decided to spew (and I literally mean spew) ink all over me. Not the paper, me. Ruined three favorite shirts, and my most bestest pair of pants ever. Feh! The only reason we haven't switched brands is the free cartridges we keep getting for our troubles. My dad's dot matrix works better than this. Feh!!
Decisions, decisions
Posted by Mike on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 11:55am.
So you're sticking with it because it splatters ink on you, but for free?


Social Security provides a shaky chance for long range profit;
A good printer provides instant counterfeiting technology!!

And on the off chance you do get caught, you spend your old age in federal prison, where you are assured minimum health care, free food, and other amenities! Better than most nursing homes!

The choice here is clear. (*begins printing out Sacagawea dollars*)
Posted by Apple on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 1:26pm.
I didn't say I'd continue to use it. I take my printables to my sister's house. Or, when my sister isn't home, my parent's dot matrix works in a pinch and I still get less ink on me than with mine. So, any way you look at it, I get my printing done for free.
Posted by ParU on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 6:42pm.
Since before most of you were born (about 1979 or so) I've gone by a few rules in dealing with computer printers - thought I'd share them with y'all:
1. Getting whatever you want out on paper is always the hardest part of every process.
2. It's not done until you actually have the printed page in your hands.
3. Always save before you print.
4. Once you've got a particularly recalcitrant thing to start to print, back away from the keyboard. Don't believe that bit about Windows being able to multi-task.
5. Never buy a printer that isn't made by Hewlett-Packard (and no I don't work there or own their stock). You'll always be able to get parts, drivers and service for HP printers, can't say the same for everything else.

It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by steff on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 6:54pm.
how old do you think most of us ARE, old man?


my favorite printer "problem" was when coworkers would tie up the network printer and walk aaaaaaall the way across the office to print out an email that THEY HAD JUST READ ONSCREEN AND WAS SAVED ON THEIR HARD DRIVE. save a tree, people!

second favorite - a printer (which various tech support insisted repeatedly did NOT have any sound-making capabilities) that started screeching. work ground to a teeth-gritting halt, and i was somehow elected to spend 45 minutes on the phone trying to find someone, ANYone, dearGodpleasemakeitstopthenoise - nownownownownownow!!

most of them hung up as soon as i held the phone near the damn thing. weenies.
Posted by ParU on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 9:01pm.
Well I'll bet '79 was before a lot of the IP folk were born... And at my previous job we had 'dot matrix' printers (for a really old legacy system). Some company would just refurbish them and give you a refurbished one for trade-in when yours broke... And I know about that email printing out thing. I never understood that behavior as 99.99% of emails weren't worth saving anyway. In regards to the awful sound, the tried and true method is to unplug the stupid thing. Works EVERY time.
It's Amino world without Chemists
I dunno, man.
Posted by paul on Sun, 04/11/2004 - 9:41pm.
I'm starting to see that many of the posters here are quite a bit older than one might think. While I'm a bit older than most of them, it's not by much- and I know that there are several posters in here who are older than I am.

Besides, the old obsolete systems have this habit of staying around for a long time and becoming kids' machines, so I'd bet that many of the younger crowd have had to deal with the old systems that we used to curse...

paul is not our savior.
paul is known as 'silk' to all who know and love him.
paul is a past master at floating progressive.
paul is that man.
Posted by Matt on Sat, 04/10/2004 - 2:32am.
If you say so, big guy. But I know for a fact that Apple, steff, Monk, and I were born in the 70s. Hell, my younger brother was born before '79.

I swear, between '94 and '95, a plurality of the emails printed out must have been of the infamous "shit list" or a variant.

And if don't know what I'm talking about, consider yourself lucky.
By your own admission
Posted by steff on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 9:36pm.
i did that... and the boss flipped out because then it couldn't be used.

you know, to print email. *sigh*

at any rate, when i plugged it back in, it started wailing again. we finally "temporarily borrowed" a printer from the office down the hall and requisitioned shiny new printers. which was my vote all along, anyway. heh.
Let me guess...
Posted by ParU on Fri, 04/09/2004 - 10:53pm.
The boss's office was far from the offending sound, wasn't it? And he (isn't it usually a 'he' in these situations) had his own personal printer, so he really didn't care.
It's Amino world without Chemists
Posted by Matt on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 9:56pm.
Printer problems!

I have no illusions that Social Security will be around when I'm old enough.

Speaking of which, I've now sent back 2 (two) Epson Stylus Photo 2200 printers, rated by CNET as the best inkjet photo printer available.

Third time's the charm?
Can someone tell me how to make Windows Media Player repeat?
Posted by jcharles on Wed, 04/07/2004 - 9:58pm.
It's all in Chinese, damn it all to hell.

I'm trying to take a nap.

shenme shenme shenme - It's a cat!
Posted by Matt on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 12:10am.
I'm not sure this works with all versions, but with Media Player 9, just press ctrl-T. That will toggle the repeat. Alternately, go to the menu options at the top and, under the Play menu, there's a Repeat option.

I don't mean to make you feel badly, babe, but that took me 2 seconds to figure out. YMMV.
Posted by daen on Thu, 04/08/2004 - 6:47am.
jcharles is out of country, and as noted, using a version that's all in Chinese.
At least I assume I'm supposed to be reading that literally.
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