"Then he offered me some water, with ice cubes stirred in, but I declined. Proudly."
--A girl talking to another girl outside Berkeley BART

"Look at that. 'When stoners go grocery shopping.'"
"...they don't go deaf. I heard that!"
--A woman at Safeway gesturing at a guy with a cart filled with chips and Ben & Jerry's, and a guy standing near the first guy.

"She's like that about everything. She has to be super special about everything. She even has to be diva about her blood pressure. It's soooo special!"
--A guy ranting to another guy at Safeway

"That's like calling up your old high school and saying you're looking to do some post-graduate work."
--A guy at Zachary's pizza

"Come here, honey. I would like to read you an amusing exceprt from this book."
--An oddly serious guy in Moe's books

"Get purple grape juice. You're supposed to drink a glass every day. Good for you."
"Says who? What's it do?"
"I heard it on the radio."
"I hate that stuff. How about we get some Safeway Select purple soda?"
"Oooo. Health food rebel."
--Two girls in Berkeley Bowl Supermarket

"I figured if I was going to be arrested I should be in costume."
"Yeah. Or covered in chocolate."
--Two uncostumed, un-chocolate-covered guys outside Berkeley BART.

"I'm not sure if she even likes him as, like, a human being. But apparently the management doesn't take 'willing to share the same planet' into consideration when deciding who will be sharing the same desk."
"At least it's not sharing the same chair?"
"I give it until the first time she moves his coffee cup out of the way and he moves it right back."
--Two women talking on Sproul Plaza

"..Basic conversation, you know, where are you from, what do you do, and he says he's an executive at a major beer company. And I said, 'Really? I like beer, which company are you from?'"
"That's totally illegitimate! That's so illegitimate. You were trying to connect on a professional level based on the fact that you're an alcoholic! That's like someone saying 'I'm an author' and you saying 'Oh, I can read.'"
"Yeah, only the author would have to turn out to write for Reader's Digest, because this guy turned out to be a vice president at Coors."
--Two guys eating pizza at Jupiter.

"How did Tyrannosaurus Rexes even reproduce? I mean, I can't picture them getting it on with out a little death or dismemberment."
--One teenage kid to another on the bus.