3 January 2004
Submitted by eve on Sun, 01/04/2004 - 11:28am. Funny
"Yeah, but then you've got to give them your address to send the check to."
"I don't think that psychos are browsing ebay for the addresses of random sellers to come and stalk. That's as dumb as worrying about the phone book."
"Good point. And it's not like you're a hot woman with pictures of yourself holding the baseball cards you're selling."
"People do that."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. Bikini babes holding the stuff in the photos, stuff like that."
"That's brilliant. They should use bikini babes to sell everything. Life insurance! Carpet cleaner! I'll bet lots of women in bikinis could sell anything."
"Exceeeeept... the movie 'The Real Cancun,' which took in a mere 6 million."
--A girl and a guy at Peet's Coffee.
1 January 2004
Submitted by eve on Fri, 01/02/2004 - 11:36am. Bizarre
"I think New Year's Eve is just a conspiracy to make you want Jamba Juice the next day. Think about it: hangovers, resolutions... um... it's winter, so you don't get much fruit in your diet..."
"Do you think maybe the holiday is older than Jamba Juice?"
--Two guys in line at Jamba Juice.
29 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Tue, 12/30/2003 - 10:00am. Bizarre
"He stole your blowdryer?"
"Yeah."
"Before or after you broke up?"
--Two women talking in the bakery section at Whole Foods.
28 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Mon, 12/29/2003 - 3:02am. Funny
"A one hundred percent drama-free holiday season is always the goal, but this year I decided that drama-free for me was good enough... Yeah. So everyone around me was having the drama and I was pretty much ignoring them and hanging out at the kids table. My aunt has the cutest kids. And kid drama's kinda cute."
--A girl talking on a cell phone at DFW

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Don't even ask how I ended up in Dallas. The airlines played ping pong with me today. No, no, not like I was the opponent -- like I was the ping pong ball. Home. Good. Goodnight.
23 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Tue, 12/23/2003 - 5:49pm. Bizarre
"And I was like, 'Darla, do you have any idea how easily the CTO of this company could be replaced by an infant? And no one would know.' *pause* ...I think she was just mad she hadn't thought of it first."
--A man talking on a cell phone at SFO
21 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Mon, 12/22/2003 - 9:51am. Beautiful
"Shut up. It's our business model, and you can't make fun of it until it totally fails."
--A guy sitting at the next table over at Khana Peena.
16 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Wed, 12/17/2003 - 5:45am. Beautiful
"Does 'it's too summery' mean you'll be cold in it? The party's indoors..."
"No, that's not it. It's just a summery fabric."
"Oh, so what you're saying is that if you go to a party in December in flowery cotton you'll be considered a big dork?"
"It's just too summery."
--A guy and a girl examining dresses at the BCBG outlet
11 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Thu, 12/11/2003 - 9:41pm. Funny
"Your bag is oversized. Our limit is fifty pounds."
"I can't really get rid of any of it now. Can I pay a fine?"
"We prefer not to refer to it as a fine, per se..."
"A convenience fee, then? That sounds better than a bribe."
--A woman and a ticket agent at SFO
5 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Sat, 12/06/2003 - 11:33am. Beautiful
"Two weeks ago she was helping me get ready, finding the old toys, going with me to the laundry room to wash the baby blankets. Now she says, 'when he's born you won't have any time for me.'"
"Well, I mean, you have to tell her that you're not going to love her any less. What is she, four? She's probably scared."
"I've told her that. I think she's just worried that she's not going to be number one anymore."
"Well, she's not. And you should tell her that. Zoe's a sweet kid, but it's better that she learns it now, instead of growing up to be one of the dazed 40 year olds whose sit here after an appointment with the shrink saying, *baby voice* '...I don't understand. I thought it was all about me.'"
--A customer and a stylist a few salon chairs over from me.
4 December 2003
Submitted by eve on Thu, 12/04/2003 - 10:52pm. Um...
"It's smoking. What's wrong with it?"
"That's steam. Are you not familiar with things that are hot?"
--A girl and a guy outside the Cheeseboard pizza shop.